


Things Requiring Sacrifice

by AsagiStilinski



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Magic, Alternate Universe - Witchcraft, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Anxiety Disorder, Anxious Katsuki Yuuri, BDSM, Body Dysphoria, Character's Name Spelled as Viktor, Character's Name Spelled as Yuri, Dom Victor Nikiforov, Dom/sub, First Meetings, Geek Love, Geeky, M/M, Magic, Meet-Cute, Nerdiness, Online Friendship, Online Relationship, Panic, Phichit Chulanont Is a Good Friend, Rich Victor Nikiforov, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, Sub Katsuki Yuuri, Supportive Victor Nikiforov, Vicchan Lives, Victor Nikiforov is Extra, Witch Katsuki Yuuri, Witchcraft, Witches
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-16
Updated: 2019-08-16
Packaged: 2020-09-02 02:56:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20268880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AsagiStilinski/pseuds/AsagiStilinski
Summary: Yuri has known Viktor for sixth months now, and Yuri iscompletelyin love with him, there's just one problem: Viktor lives in RussiaHaving only ever talked online, Yuri is in a constant state of mourning for a relationship that he'll never have... or so he thinks, until Viktor shows up on his doorstep one day saying he moved to Japan just to be with YuriNow all of a sudden the relationship that never was very muchis, and Yuri is going to have to learn how to navigate being in love with someone he never thought he could have, along with managing his anxietyThough those aren't the only things he'll have to work with, to complicate matters further, he and Viktor didn'tjustfall in love online... they also discussed a very kinky relationship that Yuri is now unsure if he's ready to have, and to put the final nail in the complication coffin? Yuri is a witch and Viktor is completely obliviousHe's pretty sure that even anime doesn't getthiscomplicated





	Things Requiring Sacrifice

**Author's Note:**

  * For [venom_for_free](https://archiveofourown.org/users/venom_for_free/gifts).

> For and inspired by my lovely Venom <3 Featuring lots of nerdiness
> 
> -All of the shirts mentioned are real shirts, the Supergirl ones can be found on redbubble
> 
> -You can skip the Supergirl passages if you'd like, they aren't really necessary, but they do have a thematic element in keeping with the themes of this chapter... ;)

**LastLoveOfKrypton:** _Kara bit the inside of her lip, her fingers curling and uncurling, nails pressing lightly into her palms, she wished for a moment that she could feel the pain, she wished for a moment that Earth had a red sun, she wished for a moment- .._

_No_

_No, even now- maybe especially now-, Kryptonite was too far, she couldn't even consider it as wishfull thinking_

_"Please," she said quietly, her fists tightening_

_"Please Lena, try to understand, I didn't have a choice, you didn't GIVE me a choice! You know as well as I do... if Lex had gotten that Kryptonite.... National City would have ended up in ASHES, and who knows what he would have done to Clark?"_

Pressing "send", he leaned back and waited anxiously for the next reply to come

He knew that he should be doing something more constructive than just sending a few emails and checking on Phichit's social media, but he couldn't help himself, he couldn't be bothered to do anything more constructive at the moment

This thread was just too good and he couldn't sit still or stand to wait on the next reply any longer than absolutely necessary

Oh angst, why must you do this to his heart?

_That's Miss Luthor To You is typing....._

Oh!

That was quick!

Good, now Yuri could justify his uselessness a little bit longer and a little bit more easily

His partner never took very long to write so surely taking just a few moments to check on Phichit's Instagram wouldn't be bad right?

He could be constructive later

(Although at nearly four in the morning was it even a big deal anymore that he wasn't being constructive?)

_That's Miss Luthor To You is typing....._

He was trying to pay attention to hamsters

He really was

He _swore_ he was

But he just.... couldn't

He kept looking at that little scribble at the bottom of the screen

He couldn't wait until he heard the familiar ***boop*** of a new message

Checking the clock again- far more than he necessarily needed to, if he was being completely honest- he noted that he only needed to wait for around another hour for the paint to dry on his project, that wouldn't be so bad, he could stand to be awake through that, especially with his partner keeping him company

***boop***

!!!!!

Practically throwing his phone, he hurried to look at the screen with excitement

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _"Didn't give you a choice?" Lena huffed, a look of utter offense and disgust on her face_

_"I have given you NOTHING but choices and you keep LYING to me Kara! How am I supposed to forgive that? How-"_

***boop***

Oh, he had a private message

....

Clicking the PM first, he smiled a little at what was written in front of him

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _That moment when you fundamentally disagree with your muse but you have to write them Like That anyway because they're just Like That D:_

Snickering quietly to himself, Yuri typed out a reply

**TheLastLoveOfKrypton:** _Really? I thought you'd agree with Lena, you know, the honesty thing?_

He went back down to the reply, already feeling that weirdly good nervous feeling in his gut, knowing that, truly, The Drama was about to explode

_"How am I supposed to trust you again!? The rest of us live our entire lives being vulnerable, being HUMAN, and you're so proud that you can't even stand the RISK of being human for even a SECOND, you just HAVE-"_

***boop***

Oh! Another PM!

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _I mean it's a hard subject because on the one hand yeah I get where Lena is coming from, especially as a dom myself, honesty is very important, but on the other hand.... I feel like.... superhero, secret identity, sort of supersedes that? And way more importantly I agree with Kara about the Kryptonite argument in general, this isn't about trusting Lena not to hurt her, this is about knowing that the most evil forces in the world could access that Kryptonite and kill her- AND her cousin mind you- because of what Lena has brought into the world, yes sure, she or Superman COULD go evil but isn't the risk of a bad guy killing Earth's finest, you know, way the fuck bigger? Plus, I mean, let's call out the pink elephant here..... she IS Lex's sister, that doesn't mean LENA is bad, but it does mean that he'll have easier access to HER Kryptonite than anyone else's, it's just... a bunch of risks that don't need to be in place and I wish they'd get past this :( Trusting Lena has never been Kara's problem, it's all very Greater Good, but Lena takes every Superhero Related Indiscretion personally and there needs to be a bit of professional separation, if that makes sense?_

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _It's like.... ok, all of my subs have to be honest with me, that's a rule, but if I was domming an FBI agent and they said they couldn't tell me about a case they were working... yeah?? I'd understand? If that case so happened to involve my cousin or something... ok, I'd be a little pinched, but still I'd understand because it's their job and not my business, it's not to do with me, it's to do with national/international security, and I feel like that's what this is you know? Lena takes everything Kara says and does as Kara @ Lena, not Supergirl @ The World and that's where the problems are, am I making sense?_

That was one of the things Yuri loved most about his partner, he always thought everything through with so much passion and effort

His heart was practically swelling as he hurried to type an answer, not wanting him to think that Yuri wasn't reading his message or had nothing to say

**TheLastLoveOfKrypton:** _It makes perfect sense and I agree, Kara isn't faultless and Lena is perfectly valid in feeling upset and lied to and betrayed but putting the world at risk out of spite or hurt feelings or anger just isn't the answer_

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _Yeah exactly! She's thinking in bubble terms, is that how you say it? When she's only thinking about how things are in reference to herself and not the world at large?_

**TheLastLoveOfKrypton:** _I think it's called "putting herself in a bubble" but please don't hold me to that, this is why I worry about the writing for next season, Lex went down such a similar path with his attitude towards Clark and I worry that they're finally going to take the plunge of really mirroring Superman's story by making Lena into a villain, the only things I'm holding onto are that Lena has repeatedly denied the villain label, no matter how many times someone tries to stick it on her, and that Lena's worldveiws are fundamentally different than Lex's, she isn't xenophobic or power hungry, she's pro-alien, she's always got her heart legitimately in the right place, they'd have to butcher her in alot more ways than just pitting her against Supergirl to fully turn her evil_

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _Darling I wish I could frame every word you just said!! ;_; Exactly!_

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _Also shouldn't you be getting to bed? Don't get me wrong, I want to end this suffering as quickly as possible, but your sleep is important zolotse_

**TheLastLoveOfKrypton:** _I'm waiting on the paint to dry on a project I'm doing, I need to wait on this side to dry so I can paint the other side and then let it dry over night, so I'll be here for another hour or so_

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _......... *squint* ............ You wouldn't be lying to me, would you zolotse?_

**TheLastLoveOfKrypton:** _No Sir Viktor <3_

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _... Good answer, how long will it take you to paint the other side of your project? (wich, what is it?? o.o)_

**TheLastLoveOfKrypton:** _10 minutes maybe? It's just the writing I have to do on it, the flat paint was applied earlier (it's a surprise, you'll find out later)_

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _Ok, 70 minutes more then, then bed, yes? (you little tease, you know I love surprises ;) )_

**TheLastLoveOfKrypton:** _Yes Sir <3 (I do know, that's why I'm surprising you)_

Yuri couldn't help but sigh in that romanticized, swooning sort of way, his eyes practically shimmering with joy and affection as he watched the familiar _That's Miss Luthor To You is typing...._ ticker across the screen

He could spend his entire life like this

He could spend his entire life just... talking to Viktor, teasing and playing and talking and just being with him, just talking to him, it was the most incredible sensation he had ever felt

So he would savor the 70 minutes he had left, and felt his heart soar at the familiar ***boop*** of a new message cropping up

~+~

**TheLastLoveOfKrypton:** _"You think I can't take pain?"_

_The very thought of it was so..... so.... **absurd** to her_

_Did Lena really think so little of her? Did those three years they spent together as freinds mean nothing? Were all those times that Lena called her strong and brave and incredible and **super** just lies?_

_She didn't know where this was coming from, she didn't even have the control to stop herself from saying what came next, she was just so angry, and so hurt, her biggest flaw- her temper- had flared up over the intensity of the pain that Lena had just inflicted upon her, and she couldn't stop herself from potentially making this even worse_

_"You think that I'm so afraid of pain? Then let me prove you wrong,"_

_She stepped closer, some part of her relieved that Lena was as unflinching as ever, even confronted with Supergirl herself trying to intimidate her, she didn't so much as blink_

_Well, atleast there was that_

_Kara would have crumbled if Lena had stepped back or looked away_

_"You have red sun lamps don't you? Take me to them, and let me show you how much pain I can take, you wanted to hurt me as badly as I've hurt you Lena? Then hurt me, **hurt me**, until you feel that I've suffered enough, until I've proven to you EXACTLY how much pain I can tolerate, until you don't have to doubt me or my motives anymore, hurt me Lena, I'm **begging** you,"_

_It didn't sound like begging_

_It sounded like demanding_

_But Kara didn't care, she was angry, and she was in pain, and her heart hurt so badly that she was almost craving the physical pain to make it go away, or at the very least ease it_

_She needed the pain, she needed something to ground her, because as of now, all she saw was **red**_

***boop***

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _How's the project coming darling? ;)_

Oh shit, had it been an hour already?

Looking down at the clock, Yuri winced

Yes, yes it had

**TheLastLoveOfKrypton:** _I'm about to check on it, I'll let you know :)_

Shit...

He hoped the paint was still wet, if it was, then he'd have a little bit more time with Viktor....

Sighing heavily, he shoved his laptop off of his lap and set it on the bed, stumbling up and going over to the desk, turning the lamp on and flopping down in his chair

Carefully, he skimmed his fingers over the peices one by one, checking all of the parts that looked anything but solid, and even over the more solid looking places, and huffing in disappointment

They were still tacky, but not wet anymore, if he was carefull he could flip them and do the other sides to leave overnight...

Pinching the bridge of his nose, he pushed back from the desk and picked up his laptop from the bed to tell Viktor

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _Ok sweet dove, let me know <3 I'm excited to know what you're painting ;)_

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _Ugh, Kaaaaaraaaaa babyyyyyyy ;____; Yuri why would you do this to my poor heart?! This hurts ;o; It's so IC but it's so painfull too_

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _Me as a dom: This is wrong and not at all consenting and I would in no way ever condone touching anyone in this state of mind, much less dominating them or hurting them- domination is about giving someone what they need, and should never be about alleviating your own anger_

_Me as Lena "Gotta Make A VR To Punch Supergirl" Luthor: let's do it bitch_

_You've put me in an awkward dilemma Yuri!_

Ugh, did he HAVE to tell Viktor that the paint was dry?

.... Yes, probably, yes....

But he could just ... take a little longer to apply the paint on the other side, right? He didn't need to rush, and there were a few spots over the undercoat that needed touching up anyway because the papper plate under them had left some little white patches because of the paint not being dry enough when he flipped them the first time so...

**TheLastSonOfKrypton:** _Sorry for the angst, you're the one who wanted this though ;) The paint is still tacky but I can flip them and do the backs, I need to touch up the undercoat though, I'll be 15-20 more minutes? But seriously I can rewrite Kara's reply if it's too non-conny for you, I don't mind_

Setting the laptop back down, he moved back to the desk and checked his supplies, picking up his water bottle to rinse one of his brushes and cursing at the fact that it was currently empty

... Right... he'd thought he was done with the undercoats earlier so hadn't bothered replacing it...

Rising to his feet, he picked up the empty bottle and the glass of dirty paint water, deciding to go ahead and rinse it out and replace that instead of bothering with the new water bottle, and headed to the kitchen to do so

He was delighted to come back with fresh water and see a new message from Viktor

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _Oh no no, don't change it! I love it, it's IC! It's fine, this thread is about pain and angst anyway, not proper etiquette xD Though now I want a proper one, Domme Lena and masochist sub Kara who is very confused about how actual S&M works, probably Mon El screwed with her head, or maybe... hm.. wasn't there a girl on the show who had a rocky relationship with her? Help, my memory is terrible D:_

**TheLastLoveOfKrypton:** _I can't recall either, I could look it up? Because **please** Viktor, oh my god, that sounds amazing?? Are you sure you're ok replying as is?_

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _ Haha, ok zolotse, I'll write the starter **when you sleep** ;) Aren't you supposed to be painting? But no really it's fine, I'm half-done with mine, and do not look it up, I'll toy with it, maybe I'll deep-dive into comic lore, we'll see, you need to paint and then SLEEP darling_

**TheLastLoveOfKrypton:** _I had to change the water for my paint, promise <3 Though isn't it late in Russia? Shouldn't YOU be sleeping soon too? I don't want to keep you up by sending you down the comic book rabbit hole_

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _I actually have to be up for the next few hours, I'll explain why in the morning, so a deep dive would do me well anyway *shrugs*_

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _OH!!!!! EVE!!! YURI! EVE! WHAT IF HER FIRST EXPERIENCE WAS WITH EVE!? Lena, ofcourse, knows Eve, and had her own experience with her, and then there's REVENGE and maybe MURDER!!?! :D I want to make the motive less "Eve is a bad domme because she doesn't know what she's doing and doesn't belong in the scene" and more "Eve knows EXACTLY what she's doing and knows who Kara is and is fucking with her because of wanting to get close to Clark to destroy him for putting Lex in prison" what do you think??_

**TheLastLoveOfKrypton:** _You're brilliant, you're absolutely brilliant, why aren't you a professional writer again??_

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _I lose interest in my own original charectors far too quickly *shrug* Among other things, but really I prefer being an artist so it's fine, and are you painting wile you talk to me zolotse? ;)_

Shit....

Ok, ok, he was going to let Viktor have a breather and put the laptop down, go back to painting

He wondered distantly what Viktor would need to be up for in a few hours

He was a freelance artist, so maybe it was a work thing....

That was probably it, he probably had a video call or something scheduled for the wee hours of the morning because of it being an international client, Viktor was no stranger to that

He let his mind wander, his heart fluttering as he thought about Viktor, about how much he cared for him, how amazing he was, how great of a writer he was....

He was barely paying attention as he applied the touch-ups to the undercoats, his focus now consumed by Viktor, wich was far from unusual

He often found himself thinking about his.... freind.....

Right, freind

Because no matter how much he wanted it to, it could never be more than that

He couldn't let himself call Viktor a boyfreind or a lover because he would only ache worse if he did

Viktor lived in St. Petersberg, far, far away from Hasetsu Japan, and there was no way that could be fixed

Yuri couldn't leave

He had commitments here, his parents were getting older and soon he would need to start taking over the majority of work at the hot springs, and he needed to be around to take care of them, he couldn't leave, especially for something so selfish as just .... the fantasy of a love across the world....

And Viktor.....

Well, actually, Yuri wasn't sure what was keeping Viktor in Russia, but it would have been beyond rediculous to ask him to move, especially to some tiny town in a distant country, where he wouldn't speak the language or know the people or have any real reason to be there....

Shaking his head, he grabbed the little bottle of 3D paint from beside him and started carefully drawing the lines he needed onto the little wooden ornaments beneath him, cursing quietly at the fact that they hadn't come out perfectly

But he'd have to correct that later after it dried, if he tried to fix it now it would just smudge, later he could go over it with the undercoat color and paint over the missteps

He tried to focus on that instead of the pain in his heart

He tried to concentrate on painting and the tiredness that was starting to set in as the length of the day and the numbers on the clock finally started to sink in

He tried to ignore the pain that was coming from the, once again, depressing knowledge that he and Viktor would never be more than just freinds, that anything past that would be no more than a fantasy for him to hold onto when he felt at his loneliest

Ignore it....

Ignore it........

The paint was applied, and he finally got up, leaving the desk lamp on for now as he knew he would need the light so he could put his laptop away once it was turned off, and slinked back over to the computer

**TheLastLoveOfKrypton:** Painting is done, I'll reply to this one and then go to bed, ok? I hate to leave though, I'll miss you :( I wish you were here with me so saying goodnight wouldn't hurt so badly

Heading back to the server, he exhaled, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment and trying to push the pain away as he started reading Viktor's newest reply

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _The look on Lena's face was certainly one of surprise, she had never expected Kara to offer such a thing_

_In honesty, she was still grappling with the strangeness of all this, with the fact that her sweet, innocent Kara was the same person who had been beaten into the ground by Reign, who had been nearly killed by Red Daughter, who had been struck with Kryptonite by Lex, over and over again.... who had lied to her, who had hurt her, who hadn't trusted her_

_The same person who she had fallen in love with twice, but who had betrayed her trust atleast that many times_

_Damn Kara and her juxtapositions_

_Damn her for breaking Lena's heart_

***boop***

**That's Miss Luthor To You:** _I know honey, but I'll see you in the morning ok? I love you Yuri, dobroy nochi_

It hurt

It hurt saying goodnight

It hurt knowing that this was all they would ever have

**TheLastLoveOfKrypton:** _I love you Viktor, oyasuminasai_

It hurt

It hurt

He went back to the server to finish reading Viktor's reply, and the first words he read were oddly ironic

_Damn this pain for refusing to leave_

~+~

It was barking that woke him up

Familiar barking, excited barking....

"Viiicchaaaan...." Yuri grumbled, clutching his pillow tighter in frustration

But the barking didn't stop

He knew there was only one way to make it end and that was to get up and see who was at the door

Vicchan only barked when there was someone at the door, so if he answered it, then the pup would stop and Yuri could go back to sleep

Rubbing his eyes, he forced himself to tumble out of bed, grabbing his glasses from the nightstand and shoving them on

Sighing quietly, he picked up the little poodle from the floor and set him down on the bed

"Stay Vicchan," he mumbled, slumping out of his room and shutting the door behind him

Why wasn't Mari answering the door?

Typically she was the first one up, greeting the first customers, and Yuri stayed up late, greeting the last, and his parents working from around eight to eight

The hot springs were open for twenty hours, so the schedule worked well to allow for everyone to sleep, so why wasn't Mari answering the door?

"Mari-neechan..... the door..... someone's at the door..." he mumbled tiredly as he sluggishly stumbled down the hall

"Mariii-neeee...."

Huh, still no answer....

Oh well, he could handle this customer and then go back to bed, right?

Trying to keep himself more awake, he reached for the door and slid it open

"Ohayo gozaimasu, e yokoso Yuu-top-"

Wait....

When he actually looked at the person in front of him, the world seemed to stand still

That face.....

He knew that face.....

"Yuri!! Hello-!"

Yuri screamed

And slammed the door shut

In Viktor's face

.....

_Fuck_

...

_"Y-Yuri!? Yuuuuriiiii-!"_

Screaming louder, Yuri began to _PANIC_

What the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck _WHAT THE FUCK?!!?!!?!?!?_

Viktor was there

_VIKTOR WAS THERE_

..........................

And Yuri had just slammed the door in his face

_"Yuriiiii? What's the matter? Did... did I do something wrong...?"_

Shakily, he opened the door again, and this time he didn't even get a chance to say anything before the poodle on the ground next to Viktor jumped on him and nocked him down

"Oooff!"

"Ah Makkachin!! No fair! I should get to hug Yuri first, I've waited SIX MONTHS!"

Oh holy shit this was real

Holy SHIT this was really happening

Viktor was pulling his cute little dog off of Yuri and then leaning down and- .... hugging him, instead of helping him up, he was hugging him so tightly and he was so _warm_ holy god how was he so _warm_!? And he smelled good, like ... like papaya and brisk winter air, wich made absolutely no sense considering it was September

"Yuri..... Yuri...." he breathed, hugging tighter and tighter, before finally raising up and leaning back, offering his hand out for Yuri's

"Hello Yuri,"

It was said as an afterthought, but... it was also said so softly, so gently and sweetly, as if Viktor were in reverence of Yuri or something

.... Yeah he definitely didn't understand that one

"H-Hello Viktor.... what... what are you doing here?" Yuri finally replied, carefully setting his hand in Viktor's and feeling absolutely ill as the taller man pulled him up

Oh god, his hands were sweating, he was cold and clammy, Viktor was warm and sweet like a cup of hot chocolate and Yuri was like a frozen fish

Help

"I came to see you ofcourse!"

"But... you.... to Japan!? You just... you just took off out of the blue to come and see me?"

"Oh no, I've been planning this for five months, I moved here!"

....

What......?!!?!?

"Moved.... moved .. here? To ... to Japan? To Hasetsu!?"

"To the house across the street!"

Oh god, oh GOD!!

"Yuri? Are you ok? You look as if you're about to be sick...."

"I'm fine!!" he squeaked, suddenly very aware of the fact that they were officially both now standing and yet still holding hands as well

Oh god, oh god, he was holding Viktor's hand, he felt light-headed...

"Oh! That's right! You've only slept for a few hours!" Viktor exclaimed suddenly, gasping and putting a hand over his mouth

"Oh I'm so sorry darling, the timezone thing, it has me a little mixed up, you should go back to bed!! We can tal-"

"No!" Yuri protested suddenly, firmly and a little too loudly

How had he not woken his parents yet...?

"N-No I just... I couldn't sleep now anyway, I just.... you... you moved here... I'm just sort of...... _you **moved** here_,"

"Well you said you couldn't leave Hasetsu because of your family and business, I'm an artist with no living blood relatives, so I just... thought, ok, I'll move then, and I won't have a hard time learning Japanese, I already speak three other languages, and this was the only way for us to be together so.... I.. hope I didn't misread your signals, you do WANT to be with me... don't you?"

"Ofcourse I do,"

That was the only thing Yuri was sure of at the moment and he would scream it from a rooftop if he needed to

"I just.... moving to another country for someone you've known for six months online... isn't that a little...-?"

"Crazy?"

"I was going to say 'extreme' but that too,"

Sadly, before Viktor had the chance to answer, Mari finally decided to show herself

"Yuri? Dare ga ima-"

"I've got it Neechan! Thanks!" he said quickly over his shoulder

Mari looked between the two of them, seeming to be unconvinced for a moment, before shrugging and wandering off, assumingly back to the living room to watch TV as she liked to do in the early mornings

Yuri heaved a breath, biting his lip and rubbing the back of his neck nervously

"Viktor.... do you um... do you want some coffee?"

"Oh! Yes I could use some! I've been up all night! Or uh, morning, as it is now,"

Sighing quietly in releif, Yuri waved Viktor along to follow him, gesturing him towards the kitchen

Well, atleast the coffee would settle his stomach, he hoped...

~+~

"So you started looking at real estate the month after you met me?"

"Yeah!!"

"Ok, _that's_ crazy, Viktor don't you think this was just a little bit... impulsive?"

Viktor shrugged, sipping on his coffee and leaning back in the kitchen chair as Yuri filled a cup for himself

"Not really, it isn't like I bought a house right then, I put months into it,"

"Months.... Viktor moving to another country is a decision that should take more than just _months_, and for someone you knew only through the internet? What if I had catfished you?"

"We video-chatted, not possible,"

"We video chatted _once_\- still possible," Yuri argued, patting Makkachin on the head as he moved to sit down at the table across from Viktor

"Please don't get me wrong, you being here is the best thing that's ever happened to me, it's like a fairytale come true, but I'm just worried that you're going to regret this,"

"I'm not, you don't seem to understand Yuri, my life was so..... so _empty_ before I met you, like I was living in greyscale, but you.. you added color to my world! Now everything is in pastels and neons and bright shining lights, how could chasing the person who gave that to me possibly lead me to regret?"

"Because you don't know me," Yuri said softly

"What? Ofcourse I-"

"You know what I WANT you to know, but you haven't ever met the real me, the bed-head and morning-breath me, the panic-attack me, the lose-my-temper me, the me who turns into a total baby when I get sick or leaves a wreckage all over the house when I'm crafting, you don't know all of the worst parts of me,"

"I could say the same to you about myself, but I want to get to know that real you Yuri, don't you want to get to know that real me?"

"Ofcourse I do," Yuri said softly, reaching out to take Viktor's hand

The problem with that analogy was that Viktor was beautifull and smart and talented and sweet, and surely his flaws could be overlooked

But Yuri..... Yuri didn't have any positive qualities, he didn't know why Viktor even wanted to talk to him in the first place besides getting a fix for Supergirl related BDSM

But Viktor would find out about all of his flaws soon and then he would regret ever meeting Yuri, and Yuri didn't think he could handle the heartbreak that would unfold around that realization

"Well there's no sense in discussing it anyway really, I sold my apartment, I'm here now,"

"How did you even afford that?" Yuri sighed, rubbing his face with his free hand

He couldn't even process what level of expense moving here must have cost Viktor, just the thought of it was sickening....

"Oh it wasn't a problem, I have a massive inheritance that I draw from,"

.....

That explained so damn much....

"Right, inheritance," Yuri mumbled back, only really half there

"Viktor... listen, I want to stay with you, I want to spend the next three days doing nothing but talking to you but... I've been asleep for the past few hours, after spending alot of my time last night crafting... I need to change clothes.. and brush my hair... take a shower .... not in that order but-"

"Oh my goodness Yuri, I'm so sorry!! Ah this timezone thing is really just... messing me up here, I'm sorry, I really should have just gone to my new place after landing instead of coming here first, I just... I thought you'd never forgive me if I didn't tell you immediately-"

"You were right," Yuri said quickly

"I would have been _pissed_ if I had found out that you were in Japan for hours and didn't tell me until later on," he said with a small smirk

Viktor's face lit up like a Christmas tree, laughing fondly and grinning from ear to ear

"I knew it! See? I know you so well Yuri! But yeah, really, we should continue this later, I'm so jet-lagged I can barely think, my eyes are blurry... I've got to sleep, I was hoping the coffee would help but apparently not, so um... I'll come by again after a nap?"

"O-Or..... you could nap here?"

Why did Yuri offer that?

Why did he not give himself the time and room to scream in peace?

Why did he-?

"R-Really!? You wouldn't mind!?!"

Oh, that's why, because Viktor looked like Yuri had just given him the best gift on the face of the earth and Yuri was weak for that face

"N-No ofcourse not, we um... we have a guest room... you can sleep and I can shower and ... after we can talk again,"

Viktor nodded excitedly, springing up and wrapping his arms around his freind, squeezing tightly

Maybe... just... just MAYBE... this wouldn't be a total fucking disaster after all.... maybe...-

"You are the BEST my little darling!! Oh and guess what I brought with me zolotse? Your sub contract! I had it printed on papper with puppies on it and everything! We can fill it out after I wake up!"

....

Aaaaaand Yuri was back to probably dying

~+~

_"Wait a minute, he just showed up there? Yuriiii that's crazy!!! Are you SURE this guy isn't completely nuts?"_

"He's not nuts Phichit, he's just gay," Yuri sighed as he rubbed his hands over his arms

He was fucking freezing

He had now entered the stage of anxiety where everything was cold, no matter what he did, no matter what he tried, and to make matters worse he was standing in front of his closet in nothing but a towel trying to figure out what to wear

It was bad enough that Viktor's first impression of him included sweat pants and an old t-shirt that said "Talk Nerdy To Me" and had a little blue frog wearing glasses on it, it was only by the grace of the Goddess that Viktor couldn't read kanji

Yuri was NOT going to let his second impression be as bad- that was what he was trying to say here

_"Well I'm gay too but you don't see ME showing up in other countries just for a cute boy, otherwise I would've just stayed in Japan with you,"_

"Haha Phich, very funny,"

_"I'm serious Yuri! You're hot! One of these days you're going to figure that out!"_

"Yeah, well, when I find a shirt that covers the majority of the fat, I'll get back to you on your assumption,"

God why didn't he just take Nishigori's advice from a few months ago and get spanx!?

Finally he decided on a nice pair of jeans

They were a size too small and would cut off his circulation but they were the closest thing he had to compression wear so they'd have to do

_"Haven't you been **losing** weight over the last year?"_

"Yeah but that doesn't really matter when I start off looking like the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man from Ghostbusters,"

_"Yuri, stop using nerd references to justify your horrible body dysphoria, and stop fat shaming yourself,"_

"Never, can we get back to the fact that I have a supermodel sleeping in my guest room now or...?"

He needed a Supergirl shirt

Where the fuck were his Supergirl shirts!?

_"Fine, but we're coming back to this later..... so... you're fine with him staying?"_

"That depends on how you classify 'fine', I'm not afraid of him if that's what you mean, he's not dangerous, just overexciteable,"

_"Like... like a poodle? You're comparing him to your poodle?"_ Phichit laughed

"Yeah I guess... he actually has a poodle too, did I mention that?"

_"Yeah about a thousand times, but if you're not scared of him, then why aren't you completely fine with this? You're kinda livin' the dream here,"_

It took the effort of reaching all the way into the back of his closet and finding the _"Not A Bird. Not A Plane. Not A Man."_ shirt he had bought for Mari last year that was too small for her and ended up being given back to him before he found a Supergirl shirt

...

It was that, or the House Of El symbol in the bi flag colors shirt, and that one was a little too form-fitting to wear comfortably

.....

He needed more Supergirl clothes....

"Because I'm afraid that he's going to hate me,"

_"Oh Yuri...."_

"And don't try to convince me that I'm freaking out over nothing, I have a perfectly good reason to be freaking out here, Viktor is this perfect, beautifull, rich artist, and I'm ... I'm just.... this twenty-four-year-old loser who still lives with his parents with no career of his own, no prior relationships, no money or beauty or talents, I'm just _worthless_...."

_"'Yuri you are not worthless!! You're my best freind! How can you say that!?"_

"Phichit he's going to hate me! All of my flaws are going to consume him and he's going to forget why he even liked me to begin with- wich I STILL don't understand anyway- and to make matters worse, he doesn't just want to be freinds, he wants to be LOVERS! I'm a virgin! He's going to find that out and I'm going to be bad at sex and then he's not going to want anything to do with me anymore and even WORSE, he wants me to be his sub! I've never subbed before Phichit! I'm going to fail at it, I'm going to fail and then he's going to hate me even more and think I was leading him on and I swear I wasn't, I WANT to but I don't know if I CAN!"

_"Yuri? Yuri you sound like you're crying, let me see your face, are you ok?"_

No, no he wasn't ok

He was on the floor of his room, trying his hardest not to completely fall apart as the tears leaked out of his eyes and he held onto his Supergirl shirt for dear life

"I don't think I can do this Phich...."

_"Oh Yuri.... Yuri come here, please? I can't hug you but ... but I still want to look at you, please?"_

Sniffling, he wiped at his eyes and hurriedly put his clothes on, dragging himself back over to where his computer currently was and listlessly grabbing his hairbrush

_"Yuri... fuck, I really wish I was there with you... as soon as I can, I'm coming back to Hasetsu and you and I are going to eat three buckets of ice cream and watch more Rupaul's Drag Race than you can reasonably tolerate,"_

"Don't hold your breath, ice cream got me into this mess to begin with and I think I could take you on with a Rupaul challenge, need I remind you that I introduced you to it by binging a full season in a day with you?"

Phichit laughed, pure and joyfull, like ringing bells, and Yuri felt just a little bit better

It was no wonder, that was his power after all, it came naturally for him, that was why he wanted to see Yuri's face

He wouldn't say it, but Yuri knew that was it

_"Yuri.... you're going to be fine, ok? You're going to be totally fine, virgins are awesome, everybody loves them! And I know you, I KNOW you can sub with the best of them if you just let go-"_

"But that's the problem, what if I can't? I WANT to, but if I can't? What if I panic and realize that it's too much for me and-"

_"**And** if he's a half-ass decent person he'll respect that and won't ask you to do it, AND if he likes you as much as he says he does- and trust me Yuri, if he came across the world for you, he likes you- then petty things like sex aren't going to change his mind about you,"_

Yuri sniffed, brushing his hair slowly and shaking his head

"I just don't ... I just don't know if I can agree with you Phich..."

_"Maybe not now you can't... but someday you will, I'm confident,"_

"I'm glad one of us is," Yuri sighed, putting his brush down and rubbing his face anxiously

"It isn't just the sex and stuff though.... you know that, he's _human_, and he's going to find out the truth about me SOMEDAY,"

_"Not all humans are out there to hurt us Yuri,"_ Phichit said quietly

"No you're right, some are out to kill us,"

Phichit was quiet, for once, not knowing what to say

Though that didn't last more than a moment

_"There are good ones out there Yuri, you know that, if Viktor is as amazing as you say he is.... could you REALLY imagine him hating ANY kind of creature just for the blood they were born with? Is he that kind of person?"_

"No... no I don't think so.... but people- _humans_\- they get weird about our world, about our people, the most open-minded humans can become the most evil people just because they're scared of us.... I don't want Viktor to hate me... that's what scares me the most, not that he might hurt me, but that he'll hate me,"

_"Look Yuri... you and I both know that relationships don't work when you hide things from eachother, you have to be honest with him, you have to tell him ASAP what's really going on, how else will you ever get any peace? And if you need me to, I'll kill him for you, Fae Folk are good for more than just granting wishes and making flowers bloom you know,"_ Phichit winked playfully

Yuri nodded slowly, only half really taking it in as he curled in on himself and gave a shaking sigh

"You're right, Phich, I have to be honest..." he mumbled, trying to swallow down tears as he slowly raised his glance to look at the computer screen so he could see his freind's face

"I'm going to have to tell him that I'm a witch,"


End file.
